Yeah, it's a bit of a pose, and a boring self portrait. Been a long day.
I'm actually very averse to my own photographs. I don't photograph well. This makes me much more comfortable behind the camera, and much I am better behind the camera too.
This self portrait was done as a last resort for today. I was going to try something comical or interesting, but got tired very quickly. I had a late finish at work. Late finishes make me tired, and cranky. And hungry. So I pedaled my little toy-ota home feeling tired, cranky and hungry, as well as self loathing. I know you can't see it in the photo (duh) but I am half deaf. It can make even the most ordinary interaction a big thing. It makes every conversation a struggle. And I do anything from 5 to 30 consults in a day, and it makes me tired. This year, being my year for projects, I am going to learn Auslan and reach out to others like me (look out!).
Anyway, days like today when I hit the tired slump I don't have the energy to strain to hear. So I just stand there, looking stupid, wishing there was some shell I could crawl into, or some way I could disapparate to somewhere else. This happens often, but is worse when I am tired. It takes so much energy to understand conversation!
So, I got home, ate some junk food crap, and then set my lights up. Much to my delight Jilly (scruffy model from day 2) had pissed all over my grey backdrop whilst I was out. I had walked her in the morning, and I was no *extremely* late home. I was pissed off! Not with her as much as myself - the thought of her pissing or crapping on my muslin backdrop came across my mind just as I walked out the door this morning, but Mr Lazy decided it would not happen, and he would cross that obstacle if it did. And it did indeed. Now I have to wash it, and dry it. And I am sure half of the dye will come out. Yippee.
Not.
Anyway, after all this I tried a few faux cranky, angry, and then some emotional expressions, but they were all stuffed and moronic, so I just glared at the camera instead, and it seemed more normal for me.
Ignore the blubber. It wasn't there 10 years ago.
Set-up for today - Softboxes at 10 and 1, beauty dish at 7, umbrella at 4, down low as fill. 580EXII with green gels aimed at backdrop at full zoom. I think you can guess the light ratios from the specular, main light and the fill in the shadows. I'm too tired to write the obvious in tonight :)
Now its time to tidy the house and wash the dog wee off my backdrop. My wife and boy come home in a few days, and it is going to take me that long to make the house clean before they come. They'll have been away 6 weeks when they return, that's a long time for a girl and a 4yo boy. I'm really looking forward to them coming back, the house is too quiet. Another bonus is 2 new models for P365 :)
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